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If you hold down the fn key, the touchbar shows the function keys, which is also how you use the fn keys on regular macs.
Also in bootcamp mode, that’s the default behavior (since the touchbar is technically its own device with its own OS it can do whatever it wants).
have they tried making it just functional?
I often want to function one-handed
You can switch the default behavior in the system settings
yes, I’m in therapy and making progress on it