Statue should be based on this picture:

Maybe by the same artist who did the Ronaldo statue:

Plaque should be:

“What day/night will be the wildest party on your island?”

‘Pedo Guy’ Elon Musk, 2012

Ah young one I was once like you until I realised, that by not making the bed, your fitted sheet ends up absorbing more dust and moisture during the day and you have to change them more frequently. For truly optimal laziness it’s best to at least throw the quilt over.