Kaul

I often see posts from the LGBT community that make me feel… Envious? Almost like I’m missing out on something. The social stigma of being “gay” for having feelings must’ve really gotten to me growing up. I feel there’s a blockage in my brain and emotions that tells me I can’t be a silly, goofy, caring guy, so I default to being quiet and closed off. Almost like my true potential as a person is being surpressed by the thoughts of myself and the beliefs of those around me.

I’ve thought about it, and I know I’m not gay, but as you describe in your post, there is some kind of societal disapproval around men having deeper emotions that I see in almost everyone around me, especially in myself. My dad and brother never vent, complain, cry, etc. They just wake up, go to work, and distract themselves the rest of the day. I can’t remember the last time I had a deep conversation with somebody other than my wife (we fortunately don’t have a “traditional” relationship in the sense of this post and can be vulnerable with each other). The last 2 times I’ve tried to communicate real issues with my dad, I’ve written real, detailed letters, which went completely ignored, twice.

I completely see what you’re getting at. Traditional gender roles DO seem to make love impossible, and the hyper-masculine(?) somehow make an exception to reproduce. At least that would explain why I was born, but my family has shown little care for the mental health or wellbeing of myself or others. It’s almost like the societal pressure to get married and have children override the actual feelings of love for others.

Too bad there are like 10 trains total in America

Basically the reason Saw is doing the crazy shit is because he’s an old guy with cancer and his health insurance said he’s too old to get care so they’re just gonna let him die. So he starts taking it out on people that are/could be related to the reason he was denied health insurance (in the 1st one I think it’s his doctor?)

At least that’s how I recall the story