Porn is missing a lot of things that are necessary for good sex - how often are you seeing lube or condoms?

Beyond that - other than shallow plots, you get blow job, jack hammer vaginal, jack hammer anal. Moaning that is performative rather than out of genuine pleasure.

I think a lot of young men are mislead by porn and peers into thinking there are magical Techniques ™ that make you a sex star, when the far more complicated reality is that you have to understand your partners body.

For example, most people enjoy receiving oral sex. You might assume that giving oral to your partner in foreplay is a good thing.However, I cannot fucking stand receiving oral and it absolutely ruins sex for me, especially when I have communicated ahead of time that I do not want it. I actually want jackhammer and blow because that ties into my own mappings of sexual pleasure. This is not what the vast majority of people want nor what culture tells us to want, but likely neither are your particular sexual desires. The best sex comes from when you connect with what they want too.

Good sex is about connecting with someone in a way such that your pleasure is tied up in making them feel pleasure but also knowing that your pleasure matters to them too. A complicated relationship ego death dance with the idea that your bodies are made to make each other cum, which is not the same as learning mechanical techniques like you would to master a claw game. This is not what porn can possibly depict or offer.

What I don’t understand is how anyone is capable of believing that a terribly lit picture of them tugging on their wiener over the toilet is sexually appealing.

Dicks are beautiful when they’re framed with respect. There’s so much variety in size, color, shape… Grindr is a good place to go if you want art references because you’ll see how crazy different guys dicks are from each other. But so few men spend more than 5 seconds thinking about how to properly display their assets.