• Carnelian@lemmy.world
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    3 days ago

    If you accept that caring for the wellbeing of your kids is inherently meaningful then you must also accept there is meaning inherent in taking care of your own self :3

    • DonutsRMeh@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      I love this. And this is precisely what I started doing. In my mind, the better I am the better they are, and that’s proven to be true. They’re everything in my world and I’m so freaking happy I decided to have kids, genuinely. My son is 13, and he’s entering that phase of “I’m a good dude and can be so much fun”. He and I are like best friends. We do almost everything together. He’s like the little brother I never had.

      • Carnelian@lemmy.world
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        2 days ago

        That’s awesome, I’m so glad to hear it! And beyond just your own family, people you may never directly hear from might see your perspective here and have their lives improved in turn, in whatever small way. There’s a certain momentum to it that we can all contribute to

    • baines@lemmy.cafe
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      3 days ago

      only while the kids exist as you forced them into existence thereby incurring the responsibility

      for a thought experiment, imagine you could see your entire life and decide to be born or not based in your mind at the point of death

      what would be the point of living a ‘bad’ life?

      • JoeBigelow@lemmy.ca
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        3 days ago

        I would personally have chosen No, and it’s a big reason why I’m not going to have a kid. Very grateful that my wife agrees

      • Carnelian@lemmy.world
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        3 days ago

        only while the kids exist as you forced them into existence

        Many parents have the same realization about their adopted children. You could argue that both types of parents are delusional but the causality isn’t relevant

        imagine you could see your entire life

        The capacity for imagining your whole life presupposes that you have already begun living, silly :3 but okay. Why would this primordial spirit be interested in life at all if it’s optional? Is living your life inherently worth considering, or something?

        • baines@lemmy.cafe
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          3 days ago

          choosing to take on the responsibility is the same imo

          biological kid or not once you bring it home it’s then the same, feeling this for random strangers would be odd

          acknowledging that a optional life would be skipped kinda is my point

          • Carnelian@lemmy.world
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            3 days ago

            Okay, so it is possible to find inherent meaning in lives you did not create. Yay!

            For part 2, you’re ignoring my question.

            Why would your thought experiment ghost even be considering life? Even before the point of knowing whether it would be “good or bad”. Why does it bother checking that at all?

            Put another way: when some dumb loser asks if I want to invest in an NFT, I don’t even need to consider that. I know inherently that what I’m being offered is fundamentally without value to anyone.

            The fact that you are evaluating your life at all in your thought experiment implies that the thing you are being offered has the potential to be valuable, yes?

            • baines@lemmy.cafe
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              3 days ago

              Okay, so it is possible to find inherent meaning in lives you did not create. Yay!

              except predication of choice makes it literally not inherent

              neither does potential imply inherent either

              it’s trivial to imagine simple real world examples that would make any positive aspect of living rather insufficient to the point where dying young and unexpectedly is almost a blessing among alternatives

              if aggressive cancer, long lasting stroke or alzheimer’s is in my future let me die sooner in my sleep

              to say nothing of famine, massive drought and war

              if i knew i’d live to experience alzheimer’s let me never be born

              • Carnelian@lemmy.world
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                2 days ago

                except predication of choice makes it literally not inherent

                Things aren’t any less meaningful just because you chose them. For example I’ve been playing the same guitar for over 20 years. That instrument is now inherently meaningful to me in a way that others are not. It’s inherently irreplaceable to me. You’ll find most musicians bond with their instrument in a similar way

                neither does potential imply inherent either

                Of course it does. Every time a guitar is destroyed on stage thousands of discussions break out about how upsetting and wasteful it is. How it could have been so meaningful to a child who wants to play but doesn’t have the means.

                We see these things and we want to connect them with the people who their meaning will most benefit, precisely because they are inherently meaningful.

                big list of horrible things

                The question of whether or not you will experience extreme suffering is not relevant to the meaning your life possesses. The 5,000 people who were just swept away in Nepal have not had their lives rendered meaningless, regardless of whether or not they would have chosen not to be born if they knew that would be their fate