• DonutsRMeh@lemmy.world
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    6 days ago

    Having kids (one of whom is special needs) plucked me out of the nihilism well that I was drowning in. I’m so thankful for them. Now, I don’t even have time to think or contemplate life. lol

    • Carnelian@lemmy.world
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      6 days ago

      If you accept that caring for the wellbeing of your kids is inherently meaningful then you must also accept there is meaning inherent in taking care of your own self :3

      • baines@lemmy.cafe
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        6 days ago

        only while the kids exist as you forced them into existence thereby incurring the responsibility

        for a thought experiment, imagine you could see your entire life and decide to be born or not based in your mind at the point of death

        what would be the point of living a ‘bad’ life?

        • JoeBigelow@lemmy.ca
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          5 days ago

          I would personally have chosen No, and it’s a big reason why I’m not going to have a kid. Very grateful that my wife agrees

        • Carnelian@lemmy.world
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          5 days ago

          only while the kids exist as you forced them into existence

          Many parents have the same realization about their adopted children. You could argue that both types of parents are delusional but the causality isn’t relevant

          imagine you could see your entire life

          The capacity for imagining your whole life presupposes that you have already begun living, silly :3 but okay. Why would this primordial spirit be interested in life at all if it’s optional? Is living your life inherently worth considering, or something?

          • baines@lemmy.cafe
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            5 days ago

            choosing to take on the responsibility is the same imo

            biological kid or not once you bring it home it’s then the same, feeling this for random strangers would be odd

            acknowledging that a optional life would be skipped kinda is my point

            • Carnelian@lemmy.world
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              5 days ago

              Okay, so it is possible to find inherent meaning in lives you did not create. Yay!

              For part 2, you’re ignoring my question.

              Why would your thought experiment ghost even be considering life? Even before the point of knowing whether it would be “good or bad”. Why does it bother checking that at all?

              Put another way: when some dumb loser asks if I want to invest in an NFT, I don’t even need to consider that. I know inherently that what I’m being offered is fundamentally without value to anyone.

              The fact that you are evaluating your life at all in your thought experiment implies that the thing you are being offered has the potential to be valuable, yes?

              • baines@lemmy.cafe
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                5 days ago

                Okay, so it is possible to find inherent meaning in lives you did not create. Yay!

                except predication of choice makes it literally not inherent

                neither does potential imply inherent either

                it’s trivial to imagine simple real world examples that would make any positive aspect of living rather insufficient to the point where dying young and unexpectedly is almost a blessing among alternatives

                if aggressive cancer, long lasting stroke or alzheimer’s is in my future let me die sooner in my sleep

                to say nothing of famine, massive drought and war

                if i knew i’d live to experience alzheimer’s let me never be born

                • Carnelian@lemmy.world
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                  5 days ago

                  except predication of choice makes it literally not inherent

                  Things aren’t any less meaningful just because you chose them. For example I’ve been playing the same guitar for over 20 years. That instrument is now inherently meaningful to me in a way that others are not. It’s inherently irreplaceable to me. You’ll find most musicians bond with their instrument in a similar way

                  neither does potential imply inherent either

                  Of course it does. Every time a guitar is destroyed on stage thousands of discussions break out about how upsetting and wasteful it is. How it could have been so meaningful to a child who wants to play but doesn’t have the means.

                  We see these things and we want to connect them with the people who their meaning will most benefit, precisely because they are inherently meaningful.

                  big list of horrible things

                  The question of whether or not you will experience extreme suffering is not relevant to the meaning your life possesses. The 5,000 people who were just swept away in Nepal have not had their lives rendered meaningless, regardless of whether or not they would have chosen not to be born if they knew that would be their fate

      • DonutsRMeh@lemmy.world
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        5 days ago

        I love this. And this is precisely what I started doing. In my mind, the better I am the better they are, and that’s proven to be true. They’re everything in my world and I’m so freaking happy I decided to have kids, genuinely. My son is 13, and he’s entering that phase of “I’m a good dude and can be so much fun”. He and I are like best friends. We do almost everything together. He’s like the little brother I never had.

        • Carnelian@lemmy.world
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          5 days ago

          That’s awesome, I’m so glad to hear it! And beyond just your own family, people you may never directly hear from might see your perspective here and have their lives improved in turn, in whatever small way. There’s a certain momentum to it that we can all contribute to

    • prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      5 days ago

      Nihilists can have, and love and care for, children.

      It’s all about making your own meaning, and I imagine having kids is one way a lot of people do that.

    • JoeBigelow@lemmy.ca
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      5 days ago

      I’m sure they’ll be grateful for their chance to pick between being a soldier in the Water Wars, or maybe getting lucky enough to find a human job that pays in food and living accommodations.

      Sorry to be that nihilist but I am so grateful for finding a partner that agrees that reproduction is wildly irresponsible to both the world, and that future being who you KNOW and cannot deny that existence will likely be worse for in basically the first time in human existence outside of the world wars and the Black Death.

      If I were forced to switch places with a child today I would be pretty upset about the future I had been subject too. But they’re just so cute right? And all my friends are having them too!

      Downvote away!

      • DonutsRMeh@lemmy.world
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        5 days ago

        What you’re saying sounds more like doomerism to me than it is nihilism. It’ll get better. Hang in there ❤️

      • Ibuthyr@feddit.org
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        5 days ago

        You’re the absolute worst and completely useless. Fuck off with your bullshit opinions and grow the fuck up.

        • JoeBigelow@lemmy.ca
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          5 days ago

          Could you maybe put some effort into your response, explaining why you so strongly disagree with an opinion I’ve developed over a pretty long time? Because you’re the one that looks childish responding so emotionally