I used to have this problem, but I somehow got over it by imagining to piss in the face of the queen of England. Something about unloading in her face while she’s sitting there all prissy like makes me laugh which relaxes my muscles enough to piss.
So thankful the internet still says infinitely more hilarious and baffling things on a daily basis than AI could ever manage.
Why do you think this couldn’t have been written by AI?
But what do you do now that there’s no queen?
Obviously the answer is to imagine Margaret Thatcher
Jesus, they want to relax not to crack the porcelain.
that guy looks like the dad from cloudy with a chance of meatballs lol
The comic for the women’s bathroom is two girls in stalls waiting for the other one to leave so she can shit.
Pro tip: If you have a shy bladder, you can just go into a stall to pee.
The walk of shame to the stall after standing silently surrounded by confident urinators for 3 minutes
I used to sit because it was more comfortable.
Now I sit for… Different reasons lmao
I guess you should change your name mmh
Anybody that has actually cleaned a toilet will be aware of the benefits of sitting
I used to sit because it avoided any splash and is supposedly better for you.
But if we’re both being honest, we were probably always sitting for eggy reasons.
All right then, keep your secrets.
frodo.gif
This reminds me of one night where a group of friends went out drinking. Just before we were going to leave the pub to go to one further down the road one friend said he needed to take a piss. It triggered something in a bunch of us as most of us realised we needed to go.
The toilets were really busy; that situation where you’re pissing in what is basically a trough with your elbows touching the elbows of other guys next to you. Immediately on trying to go it just wasn’t happening. I stood awkwardly for about a minute, zipped up, washed my hands and went outside.
Everyone gathered round and we started walking. We were walking in silence for about a minute when one guy said “Did anyone else manage to actually pee?” To which loads of us burst out laughing. Turns out we all did the same thing, even though we needed to pee, we all failed to do so.
That’s a real group of bros
More like a group of betas!
No one is more beta than the guy calling others a beta.
Great, now I’m not going to be able to pee all day.
Try counting to ten while you pee.
That doesn’t work if I can’t start peeing!
I sit down when I pee. There nothin that crazy bout me.
In the urinal? Like, facing forwards?
sidesaddle, like a prim and proper lady, all shipshape and bristol fashion