Every negative emotion I have, I’m told to go to therapy.
Negative emotions are human!
Why have we, as a society, grown to fear them?
Negative emotions are human, but often we arent well equipped to deal with them. If you can deal with them in a mature and responsible manner, congratulations! If not, therapy can get you to that point.
We dont need to journey through everything alone, often a helping hand is necessary to pull you forward.
No I agree with you, no emotions are negative. They all have a purpose, and are a personal message to you (not anyone else). Boredom is a wind up machine for future prospects, that’s where you develop your sense of who you are and want to be. And if you want to be a crazy inventor, grab a white lab coat, mess up your hair and get yourself some Boredom. Anger can fire action to improve your situation. Or, you know if you happen to have a lot of money and no relatives, grab yourself a black rubber suit with wings.
I could go on. But all emotions are a message for you from your sense systems. They’re always reading the room, they’re non verbal, emotional alarm systems are the way they tell you a room is on fire or full of flowers.
It’s when you get stuck in an emotion that can be problematic. Rumination, or inability to emotionally process those emotions can cause life to feel super uncomfortable. And you can absolutely ask for help from someone who went to school to learn the mysterious ways of the emotional brain.
Emotions are kinda like a more sensitive and intricate alert system for danger approaching, as opposed to the more sledge hammer version provided by your fight or flight systems (all the same place).
If you don’t notice your emotions, bottle or ignore your emotions, they feel unheard, and what does any alert system do if it’s mildly sentient and feels like their danger alarts didn’t get heard? They just get louder until they feel like you got the message.
So whilst absolutely all emotions are a full and complete part of the human experience and can be vital and essential to life’s progression and an assistance, they can also start going defcon 5 over the toast being burnt, and therefore need some recalibration.
And then there’s emotional immaturity…
For most people, therapy is the only way to speak with a person who isn’t like most of the commenters here.
Because I went from having 4 to 15 panic attacks a month to being able to count the time between panic attacks in years.
Because my panic attacks went from being because it’s Tuesday to being because I was in situations with actual dire consequences.
Because once I learned that it served no one involved for me to bend myself into an an ill fitting shape to avoid all conflict I was able to have lasting romantic and platonic relationships (married 8 years now and have told my wife I’m glad I met her after doing all the therapy).
Because of the dozens of things I learned explicitly and implicitly through the process. Because I am still using tools offered to me. Because I am actually happier and more fulfilled than I had ever expected I could be.
- Therapy is a healthy way to deal with all emotions, not just negative ones; there are plenty of positive emotions that can be unhealthy.
- It’s not always, or even typically, fear that is moving people in the direction of therapy.
- Therapy is human as well.
You’re stigmatizing something that’s perfectly fine for people to seek out and suggest.
Your flawed premise is showing.
Therapy is a band aid for the alienation we feel under capitalism. We are an increasingly isolated society. It’s every man for himself out there. We’re not meant to live like this. We need other people. We need people to share our experiences and feelings with. Therapy fills that role very well. I have been in therapy for 6-7 years and it’s helped me a ton. I would recommend it, but I’m also of the opinion that if we ever were able to make to communism, very few people would need therapy.
I don’t see this. I should note I’m an American, since some here have claimed this is an American thing.
So this is either particular to the people you are surrounded by, or something particular about you that makes people want to suggest therapy.
Me personally? Because I experienced childhood trauma that I had no idea was childhood trauma. All I knew was I kept losing friends in my life and had a lot of conflict and I was clearly doing something wrong.
So I decided to try therapy. Turns out, normal people communicate their problems with people around them and try to find a solution. They hold boundaries to keep themselves happy and safe.
They don’t manipulate people into doing things. They’re not overly helpful and try to fix every problem around them for every person at the expense of themselves. They don’t take little meaningless things as a personal attack and they don’t expect others to read their mind.
People didn’t want to be around me because I was overly helpful and tried to fix them to the point I was manipulating people and situations and causing harm to myself and others. Turns out when you grow up with a narcissist, even if your intent is good, you still have to unlearn all the fucked up lessons of your life.
That’s why I personally went to therapy. My life is significantly better after several years of therapy. I might even go back one day. I’m able to have deep and meaningful relationships now. Therapy didn’t make me not feel negative emotions. Actually, it forced me to. Because I had been running away from then my entire life.
Therapy is a wonderful tool if you’re willing to actually reflect on yourself.
People don’t see your emotions. They see your behavior. They hear what you say, observe your actions and reactions, and from that they decide if they want to suggest therapy or not.
I don’t know if you need therapy or not because I’ve never met you in person. But if a large number of people you encounter suggest you seek out a therapist, it’s not because of anything you felt. It’s because of something you said or did. And you may be wise to reflect on those moments when they happen.
Sounds like something you should talk over with a therapist.
I’m pretty sure the sarcasm in your comment was totally lost on most people who modded you up. And just for that, have a mod point 🙂
I’m pretty sure the sarcasm in your comment was totally list on most people who voted you down. This includes me.
Modded you up? Mod point? What are these?
The clear belief behind your post is that people suggest going to therapy because they think it will relieve you of your negative emotions. This is not what therapy does though, so maybe it would be helpful to start there. Is that what you think therapy does?
There’s a difference between feeling and being in touch with your emotions, and being controlled and driven by them, if you’re the latter people may be suggesting therapy for that reason, and it can help.
Therapy isn’t “just for negative emotions” in the same way the doctor isn’t just for dealing with the occasional common cold.
If you’re being told to see the doctor all the time, and you’re being dismissive of it without a reason past knee jerking, maybe hear them out? You’re positing this openly online so I think you’re already considering this.
Negative emotions are human but some people need help to learn to handle them in healthy ways.